Brad Marley's Blog

10 Things Not to Say To a Reporter

This is my attempt at humor while I think about more serious, thought-inducing things to blog about.

1. "I'll set up that interview for you, but from now on I want you to refer to me as 'Deepthroat.'" 

2. "How much does it cost to write a story about my client?"

3. "You're only blogging for the paper? I'm sorry, but my client prefers to work with a real reporter."

4. "Remember during the interview when my client compared his competitor's workforce to "slave labor"?  Can you just strike that from the conversation?" 

5. "Why, yes, this is the Brad who called you from ABC Tech Company.  I just want to make sure you received the ten voicemails I left regarding our upcoming product launch."

6. "I need to know what you look like so my executive can pick you out from the crowd when you arrive at tomorrow's event.  On a scale of 1 to 10, where would you rank yourself?"

7. "I'm sorry to hear you've been laid off.  Can make sure the profile piece we worked on together runs before you are asked to clean out your desk."

8. "What's Twitter?"

9. "I would be happy to offer you a demo of our product, but the last time we did that you wrote a particularly scathing review that we were not happy with."

10. "Can we still be Facebook friends?"  

Al Madrigal Explains Parenthood

If you are a parent, you will be nodding your head (and laughing) through the entire clip. 

But even if you're not a parent, it's pretty damn funny.

Famous Tweets In History

As the title suggests, this is an imagining of Twitter usage during key moments in world history if, you know, Twitter existed.  If all goes well, it might become an ongoing item.  If all doesn't go well, you never read this post, got it?

***

Just got done talking to my Dad. Headed back to see the guys. I'm wary of this Judas fellow.
@JC

Looking for my other lantern. Things are about to spiral out of control. Better get to the church to warn @Hancock and @HopsLover
@RevolutionaryRider

Just met a guy named Steve who lives down the hall. Had some pretty innovative ideas. Looking forward to spending more time with him.
@TooSmartForHarvard

Deciding upon which top hat to sport tonight. Going with MT to see "My American Cousin." Should be a blast.
@HonestAbe

Almost bit it stepping down from the ladder. That would have been embarrassing. Buzz is giving me grief.
@FirstManonMoon

RT @DallasInhabitor Just witnessed president get shot. Motorcade sped off soon after. Swear I heard shots from building and grassy hill.
@BreakingNewsDallas

Rodrigo just yelled they've spotted land.  Wasn't really expecting to find it here. We'll be docking shortly and exploring.
@GenoeseNavigator

We have returned to Roanoke to find nobody left. Someone found "CROATOAN" carved into tree. Will explore if weather subsides.
@EnglishArtist

Right stomping gig performed tonight at the church. Met a chap named Paul who seems to be the right sort for the band.
@Peacemaker

I have convinced my men to cross the river at night. We might light fires to give off the appearance of our presence. Hope it works.
@OriginalCOC